My numbers in the polls

less than 1 minute read

Every once in a while in Calvin and Hobbes Calvin would walk up to his father, clipboard in hand, and inform his father of how he was doing in the household polls.

Right now my numbers in my own household aren’t doing so well, particularly among the feline constituency. Polls show that I’m not home enough and that when I am home I spend too much time painting and cleaning and cooking and not nearly enough sitting on the couch reading or watching a DVD.

I’ve consulted with my top advisors and we’ve implemented a plan which appears to be improving our approval ratings. What is that plan? I can tell you that in two words:

Space Heater.

That’s right. Space Heater. Installation of a small space heater in the bedroom and the feline constituent of the district seems willing to overlook a large number of my other obvious flaws. Once the novelty of that wears off (or this cold snap ends) I’ll have to find another way to distract her from the real issues. My advisors are tackling this problem as we speak.

Categories:

Updated: